- A Parent's Broken Heart by Mike Gifford
- It's Always the Parent's Fault...Or Is It? by Pat Gates
- Whatever You Write on the Heart of a Child (poem)
- How to Make a Delinquent in 12 Easy
- Who is the Delinquent (poem)
Cheating Heart by Brad Harrub
- To the Married and Unmarried by Joanne Beckley
- Don't Hope, Decide! (unknown)
- The Parable of the Prodigal Son by Jim Bullington
A Parent’s Broken Heart
It happens much too frequently. A faithful Christian father and a faithful Christian mother
agonize over a loss. It's not a loss of life over which they are grieving. Instead, their distress has been brought on by
a son or a daughter who has gone into the world of sin and turned his or her back on God.
The circumstances vary. In some cases the child had been a faithful Christian but has since
fallen away. In other cases teh child never obeyed in the first place and now is hard-hearted. Regardless of the reason,
the child is a servant of Satan and Godly parents fear for that soul.
Often the first reaction of a parent in this situation is to blame himself or herself. What could have been done
differently? What wasn't done that should have been? What was done that should not have been? Since Proverbs 22:6 states,
"Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it," the fact that the child
is disobedient to God must mean that there was parental failure, or at least this is the conclusion to which a parent might
come. Granted there are examples of parents who did not tend to their children's spiritual needs, but is a child's
unfaithfulness always the resut of errors in parenting? If it were true that a parent's faithfulness guarantees faithful children,
then would it not also be true that a parent's unfaithfulness guarantees unfaithful children? Of course, there are several
examples of righteous men and women who grew up in ungodly homes. Go back and read the history of the kings of Israel and
Judah in the books of Kings and Chronicles to see some Bible examples of Godly men whose sons turned away from the Lord as
well as ungodly men whose sons turned to the Lord. Let's also consider families in which there are multiple children, some
of whom are faithful and some of whom are not. How can that be explained? Even though the parent of an unfaithful child deeply
feels guilt over the child's waywardness, the fact of the matter is that the child has free will just like the parent does.
With that freedom to choose, he or she has the freedom to make wrong choices, one of which is disobeying God. Certainly a
parent should do some self-examination and if an unholy example has influenced the child for evil, then repentance should
be made by that parent. Whether or not this is the case, a frank discussion with the child regarding the parent's influence
over the years should be conducted.
such a critical role in a parent's attempt to restore a disobedient child. Why would a parent not lovingly, yet firmly, show
that child from God's Word that he or she is lost? Why would a parent not let that child see and feel the hurt that he or
she is causing? When a parent trying to bring a child to God or back to God, it is not a time for timidity or fear of saying
the wrong thing that might drive the child away. The child has already left the Lord. Jude wrote, "And others save
with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh," (Jude 23).
I invite parents to share this article with their unfaithful children.
Hoping that will be done, I make an appeal. Unfaithful friend, not only are you lost in your current state of disobedience,
you are also tearing your parents up inside. They are afraid that you will die in your lost condition. They love God and are
looking forward to being with Him in eternity. They love you and want you in heaven as well. Won’t you at least sit
down and talk to them about the direction you have taken in your life? They are hurting. They are heavily burdened by your
disobedience. How much do you care about their pain?
Parent’s Broken Heart
Tonight a heart is shattered,
is wet with tears,
A mind is heavy laden
With worries and with fears.
Tonight a soul is praying
In sad and mournful strains.
Few tragedies on earth
Can bring such depth
“Dear God, I pray, be patient,
Longsuffering and kind.
He’s turned his heart toward sin.
Please, Lord, give him time.
“Lord, it must be my fault.
I must have erred some way.
If I’d been a better Christian
would not have gone astray.
“Lord, I feel so helpless.
can I bring him home?
I just can’t bear the thought
Of losing this precious soul.”
Tonight is like the last one
And all the ones to come
For the parent of a prodigal
‘Til he returns
The doubts and fear and anguish
Keep weighing on the soul.
There is little rest for the parent
Whose child has left the fold.
only sons and daughters
Who’ve chosen to depart
Could see how their unfaithfulness
Breaks a parent’s
It's Always the Parent's Fault...Or is It?
FROM THE MAIL:
It's so discouraging to know there are still those in the church
who strongly and vocally believe that the parents are responsible for their child's remaining faithful.
We constantly pray that ours will see their need
for the Lord in their life and return to Him. I also pray for knowledge and wisdom to say and
do the right things when I can to prick their conscience. The loss of their
souls weigh so heavily on us. -anonymous
RESPONSE FROM PAT:
heart goes out to you. Many years ago I
experienced this great sadness and fear. Fortunately for me it was short-lived, however, I remember the trauma of those days.
I remember how I would hear remarks from others and from the pulpit about children's unfaithfulness being caused by lack of
training and teaching from God's word. I believe some of these people say this as a general statement as the writer of Proverbs
did when he said, "Train up a child in the way he should go and even when he is old he will not depart from it,"
Prov. 22:6. Broadly speaking this is true: Teach children the truth from God's word and they will grow up faithful children.
Don't teach the truth and they will grow up unfaithful. Proverbs are "wise sayings that expresses effectively some commonplace
However, there are some who believe that proverb applies to every case and will become judges of righteous
parents of unfaithful children. How do I know this? Because I was one of those people who wondered what the parents did wrong...
I was one, that is, until I experienced the same thing. "Experience is the most brutal of teachers."
Some may talk
about or preach about the parent's responsibility
in the child's ongoing unfaithfulness but may not consider the righteous sitting in the audience (or in a discussion
group) who are in terrible pain
as they continually contemplate what went wrong. Comments are often made in general but, unfortunately,
they may be made without thought of the various situations
in the lives of those who are listening, namely righteous parents
who have put forth the effort to instruct their children in the way of the Lord.
regards to whose fault it is when adult children remain unfaithful, consider this:
I was unfaithful in
my 18th and part of my 19th year. My
mother taught me well, not only in biblical knowledge but by example. While I had been strong
and remained firm in my high school years, when I got out on my
own I became weak and I chose to give into the temptations of
the world. My mom's teachings rang loudly in my head at first and guilt was great, but I soon hardened
over time, guilt lessened and it became
easy to ignore my conscience that my mom worked so hard on throughout my childhood.
was to blame? My mom? After all she wasn't all wise, all knowing, and she
did make some mistakes so can I blame my actions on
her? Was the world at fault? The truth is, it was my fault, entirely my fault. It was my choice to ignore
my mother's teaching and, most of all,
my heavenly Father's teaching.
Let's look at an example from the Bible:
And he (Amon) did that which was evil in the
sight of Jehovah, as did Manasseh his father; and Amon sacrificed unto all the graven images which Manasseh
his father had made, and served them.
And he humbled not himself before Jehovah, as Manasseh his father had humbled himself; but this same
Amon trespassed more and more. And his servants conspired
against him, and put him to death in his own house. But the people
of the land slew all them that had conspired against king Amon; and the people of the land
made Josiah his son king in his stead.
If we assume it is always the parent's fault that older children choose unfaithfulness
then what kind of character should Josiah have? Well, of course, we would naturally come to the conclusion he would
be very wicked like his father and grandfather. However, the opposite happened: "And he did that
which was right in the eyes of Jehovah, and walked in the ways of David his father,
and turned not aside to the right hand or to the left." 2Ch 34:2
Now we have to assume Josiah
had faithful children because of his righteousness. After Josiah's death two of his
sons became king. The first, Jehoahaz: "Jehoahaz was twenty and three years old
when he began to reign...and he did that which was evil in the sight of Jehovah, according
to all that his fathers had done." 2Ki 23:31-32
Josiah's second son, Jehoiakim, also
reigned: "Jehoiakim was twenty and five years old when he began to reign; and he reigned
eleven years in Jerusalem...and he did that which was evil in the sight of Jehovah,
according to all that his fathers had done. 2Ki 23:36-37
The fact of the
matter is: Ungodly parents can end up with a righteous child and righteous parents can end up with an ungodly
child. Also, a wishy-washy parent may have a child grow up to be firm in the faith while a faithful
parent may bear a child who grows up wishy-washy, never developing into a spiritually
mature individual. The reason for this is, children grow up with their own individual
faith (or lack thereof) and no adult child gets to ride on the faithfulness of their parent's
coattails nor does their unfaithfulness point directly to their parents.
Consider the justice of God in Ezekiel 18:20: "The soul
who sins shall die. The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father, nor the
father suffer for the iniquity of the son. The righteousness of the righteous shall be upon
himself, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon himself." God, Himself, declares that it is quite possible
for a righteous father to have an unrighteous son. Who are we to judge otherwise?
We, too, must be just in
our judgments and there are times when judgment is not what is necessary and needed, but
rather a genuine love and sympathy for righteous parents who have, hopefully temporarily, lost children to this
world. After all, we have a perfect heavenly Father and yet, we have turned away from
His teachings. Is it God's fault or ours?
Being the parent of an unfaithful child,
as you said, is a heavy burden to bear and one that is lonely and heartbreaking, Not only do these
parents have to deal with sadness and fear but the continual search for wisdom of what
to say to their child and how to say it. It is an unending labor of survival, continually
throwing the lifeline out, hoping to save those who are loved so dearly. These parents need an understanding
ear, support, friendship, and prayers.
To the one who wrote, I
appreciate your labor of love in being diligent in helping your children. Please don't ever
give up as I've seen examples of children returning years later. That isn't said to be discouraging, but rather reminding
you that hope continues. In regards to what others say about the blame being put on
the parents, remember that God knows the situation and while uninformed comments may
hurt, ultimately God is the one we need to please.
May God bless you with peace, dear parents, and may you get
up from your knees, confident that God hears your prayers
you write on the heart of a child
No water can wash away.
The sand may be shifted when billows are wild
And the efforts of time may decay.
Some stories may perish, some songs be forgot
But this graven record —
time changes it not.
Whatever you write on the heart of a child,
A story of gladness or care
The heaven has blessed or earth has defiled,
Will linger unchangeable
How to Make a Child into a
Delinquent in 12 Easy Steps
is thought to have been prepared over fifty years ago by a police captain.)
Begin at infancy to give the child everything he wants. In this way, he will grow up to believe the world owes him a
2. When he picks up bad language, laugh at him. This will make him
think he's cute.
3. Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he is
twenty-one, and then let him "decide for himself".
4. Avoid using
the word "wrong". It may develop a guilt feeling. This will condition him to believe later, when he is arrested
for stealing a car, that society is against him and he is being persecuted.
Pick up everything he leaves lying around: books, shoes, clothes. Do everything for him so that he will be experienced
in throwing all responsibility on others.
6. Let him read any printed matter
he can get his hands on. Be careful that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized—but let his
mind feast on garbage.
7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of your
child. In this way they will not be too shocked when the home is broken up later.
Give a child all the spending money he wants. Never let him earn his own. Why should he have things as tough as you
9. Satisfy every craving for food, drink, and comfort. See that every
sensual desire is gratified. Denial may lead to harmful frustration.
Take your child's part against neighbors, teachers, and policemen. They are prejudiced against your child.
11. When he gets into real trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, "I never could do
anything with him!"
12. Prepare for a life of grief. You will be likely
to have it.
Who is the Delinquent?
We read in the papers,
We hear on the air
Of killing and stealing
And crime everywhere.
We sign and we say
As we notice the trend.
Where will it all end?”
But can we be sure
That it’s their fault alone?
That may be a part of it
Kids don’t make movies,
They don’t write the books,
That paint a gay picture
Of gangsters and crooks.
don’t make the liquor,
They don’t run the bars,
They don’t make the laws
don’t buy cars.
They don‘t make the drugs
That addle the brain;
It’s all done
by older folks,
Greedy for gain.
In far too many cases
We find this to be true,
The label “Delinquent”
older folks, too.
Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the
kingdom of heaven. Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, but whoever causes one of these little ones who
believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the
depth of the sea. Matt. 18:4-6
Your Cheating Heart
Having looked into the tearful eyes of parents whose children have
abandoned the Faith, I have learned there are a million miles between our children “going through the motions”
in reference to their spiritual lives versus our children possessing hearts that dictate their actions. In this column, I
plan to share with you what I hope to instill in the hearts of my own children and those whom I love.
does not start in the bedroom. Oftentimes it starts with a lively conversation or maybe a Facebook exchange. Conversations
blossom into flirting. Flirting then takes on a whole new dynamic as personal feelings are shared. Rather than sitting down
with a spouse and sharing problems and concerns, individuals spill their guts to a stranger who is quick to console and provide
emotional—and eventually physical—support.
I dare say there is not a congregation
in the church that has not felt the devastating effects of adultery. Our hearts sink when we hear about yet another couple
torn apart by the tentacles of infidelity. Occasionally, the sin is committed with someone outside the church family. Many
times, however, a married individual turns to someone within the church family. Multiple families are destroyed as selfish
individuals seek their own pleasure and treat their marriages like a doormat. Adultery has affected young and old, rich and
poor. We can all identify friends, preachers, deacons, and elders who have turned their lives upside down in search of greener
grass. Few consider the lasting damage to their children, their families, the church, and their relationship with God in search
of a few moments of physical pleasure. It’s the heat of the moment.
Here’s what I
intend on teaching my children about adultery.
I’m going to make an admission that will
likely get me into a great deal of trouble: Your mother has more wrinkles and gray hair than the day I asked her to marry
me. (I do too for that matter!) But I can honestly say that when I look at your mother today she is more beautiful than the
day we married. Many times I will look at her without her knowing and smile from ear to ear at how lucky I am to be married
to such a beautiful woman. Your mother has a beauty that radiates from her very soul. I found a Proverbs 31 woman and I rejoice
with the wife of my youth (Proverbs 5:18). I pray that one day you will be able to experience a similar feeling.
Marriage is for life. It is the second biggest decision you will make in your lifetime. The vows you make before
God, your family, and friends are not to be taken lightly. The way in which you view the opposite sex must change on that
day, as you are no longer “looking” for someone. Your search is over—forever! (Matthew 5:27-30).
Your marriage should focus on getting one another to heaven. If you get married and focus on what you “don’t”
have, I assure you that your marriage will suffer. Allow me to be blunt for a moment: There will always be someone out there
with more physical beauty, talents, or wealth than your spouse. (You are not excluded from this either!) However, always remember
that just because the grass may appear greener does not mean it tastes good or doesn’t come with some serious maintenance.
It is easy to focus a great deal of importance on physical things when you are young, but physical things will eventually
fade away. I want to encourage you to focus on the beautiful grass you have been blessed with and count your blessings every
One wonders how much Solomon knew of his dad’s relationship with Bathsheba.
Consider the warning he gave against adultery in Proverbs 5. After describing the immoral woman’s lips as dripping honey
and her mouth smoother than oil (vs. 3), he goes on to say, “Remove your way from her. And do not go near the door of
her house” (vs. 8). Don’t even place that temptation before you. When one combs through God’s Word and researches
the topic of marriage, divorce, and remarriage, the action of infidelity keeps bubbling up as a lynchpin (Matthew 19; 1 Corinthians
7) that—like death—can sever a marriage. It is a sin that was singled out in the Ten Commandments (Exodus 20:14).
Guard against it with diligence!
Your mom and I occasionally talk about the reality of adultery.
We are smart enough to recognize that the devil is “seeking whom he can devour” (1 Peter 5:8), and that includes
the two of us! I am careful not to be alone with any woman other than your mother. I will often talk about my wife and children
in front of individuals so they know I am a family man. We know if either of us let our guard down then devastating things
could happen. As such, we try to be proactive to ensure that we are never in that position. From basic things like sharing
computer passwords to more advanced things like phoning and letting one another know where we are, we are committed to one
another (and God!).
I pray that you will “drink water from your own cistern” and work
hard to make your mate happy (Proverbs 5:15-20). Read Song of Solomon with your spouse and fulfill one another’s physical
needs. Enjoy the intimacy of your marriage and flee temptation. Lastly, my child, never forget the things I have taught you…Proverbs
To the Married and Unmarried
Where does emotional intimacy belong between men and women? In the marriage bond. Outside
of marriage we are truly vulnerable to giving to another what belongs to our mate and leading us too close to the sin of fornication/adultery.
When we share with another the companionship (our intimate thoughts and feelings) that belongs to our spouse, we
have stolen, cheated, even lied–to our spouse and to ourselves. Adultery is condemned many times in the scriptures,
but the path taken toward adultery is also recognized and condemned, Job 31:1; Prov 6:25 Mat 5:28. Adultery, the end result,
begins in the heart. What can start out in all innocence can develop and change. “Then the lust, when it hath conceived,
beareth sin: and the sin, when it is fullgrown, bringeth forth death” (James 1:14-15).
But too many married
Christians are not living Jesus’ words as we should. “See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as
wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil” (Eph 5:15-16; Mt 10:16). Nor are we arming our children to understand
the process the heart takes in relationships with the opposite sex. How can we, if we ourselves are not walking wisely? Instead
we justify our actions without acknowledging the possible very real end result.
Everyone needs close meaningful
friendships, especially with people of the opposite sex. Young unmarried men and women are also vulnerable. Emotional intimacy
is a step forward in the process of choosing a mate for life. But when we go down this path with one of the opposite sex without
the purpose of marriage in mind, then we walk a very dangerous path. This is especially true in developing friendships with
older married men or women. A young person will gravitate toward the one who supposedly understands his/her needs that are
not being met. This innocent action toward a married person thus creates a closeness that can open up the possibility toward
emotional intimacy and ultimately fornication/adultery.
There are signs that can help us identify when friendship
is developing into dangerous waters. The following points are not progressive, but rather they are identifying marks:
say, “We are just friends”. These words are usually said to justify what we know is wrong.
is a “twinkle” in the eye. You enjoy the sexual attraction (lustful thoughts) and want more.
look forward to seeing him or her/you want to tell them the news first.
▸ You share intimate emotions and problems.
▸ You give gifts not normally given to a friend.
▸ You daydream about him or her.
▸ You spend
time alone together.
▸ You are feeling guilty and dishonest.
▸ You feel like you have shared too much,
and now feel vulnerable.
So, why? Why do we walk down this emotional path that leads to destruction? If we can
understand WHY then it will help us to remove the temptation.
▸ Do I have unfulfilled needs?
▸ Do I
have a problem accepting criticism, always needing positive feedback?
▸ Am I dealing with a long-term hurt that
has not been resolved?
▸ Am I no longer sharing myself (my thoughts, my needs) with my wife/husband?
What can we do if we find ourselves sliding down this path that may already contain lustful thoughts?
▸ Break off
the relationship immediately and quickly. Be honest, sincere, and with all humility.
▸ Recognize that emotional
intimacy involving one who is married is unfair to all parties involved. Put on their shoes and walk! You have stolen from
them in so many ways. Marriage is a bond that requires faith, trust and long-term attention and right now this is no longer
▸ Accept the guilt you are feeling, recognize its source and ask forgiveness from those you have hurt
and THEN to your God. Take responsibility for your lack of integrity and honesty. Don’t let guilt overcome you, but
rather use this experience as an opportunity for self-reflection and spiritual growth.
▸ Relationships don’t
just happen. They all require work. Repairing relationships also require hard work. It is the price you have to be willing
▸ Analyze any unfulfilled desires. Truly if we don’t deal with the underlying unfulfilled needs,
we can fall prey to yet another such temptation later on.
▸ Write down what you have learned. Write down your thoughts
and hopes. Write down what you think an ideal relationship should be–with married folk, with unmarried folk. (And to
the married, share them with your spouse!)
▸ Don’t hide from your emotions. You have treated them cavalierly
and now you must deal with them, control them, divert them.
▸ Create physical distance from the relationship. This
must include social media, chat rooms, cellular phones through texting, etc.
Like Job, let us make a covenant
with our eyes (our mind, heart, and soul).
Don't Hope - Decide!
A few years ago a man was waiting for a friend at the airport in Portland, Oregon. Among the passengers leaving the plane, he noticed a man coming toward him carrying
two light bags. He watched as the man stopped to greet his
family. First he motioned to his youngest son (maybe six
years old) as he lay down his bags. They gave each other a
long, loving hug. As they separated enough to look in each other’s face, the father said, “It’s so good to see you, son. I missed you so much!” His son smiled somewhat shyly, averted his eyes and replied softly, “Me, too, Dad!"
The man stood up, gazed into the eyes of his
oldest son (maybe nine or ten) and while cupping his son's face in his hands said, You're already quite
the young man. I love you very much, Zach!” They too hugged a most loving,
While this was happening,
a baby girl (perhaps one year old) was squirming excitedly in her
mother’s arms, never once taking her little eyes off the wonderful sight
of her returning father. The man said, "Hi, baby girl!," as he gently took the child from her mother. He quickly
kissed her face all over and then held her close to his chest while rocking her from side to side. The little girl instantly
relaxed and simply laid her head on his shoulders, motionless in pure contentment.
After several moments, he handed his daughter
to his oldest son and declared, “I’ve saved
the best for last,” and proceeded to give his wife a long, passionate kiss. He gazed into her eyes for several seconds and then silently mouthed, “I love you so much!” They stared
at each other’s eyes, beaming at one another, holding both
hands. The bystander then realized how
totally engrossed he was in the wonderful display of genuine love
beside him. He suddenlyfelt uncomfortable, as if he were invading
something sacred, but was amazed to hear his own voice nervously
ask, “Wow! How long have you two been married?”
“Been married twelve years,” the
man replied, without breaking his gaze from his lovely wife’s
how long have you been away?” the bystander asked.
“Two whole days!”
The bystander was stunned. By
the intensity of the greeting, he assumed the man had been gone
for a least several weeks, if not months. Almost offhandedly,hoping
to end his intrusion with some semblance of grace, he said,
“I hope my marriage is still that passionate after twelve years!”
The man suddenly stopped smiling. He looked him in the eye, and with forcefulness that burned right into his soul he said something that left the bystander
a different person. He said, “Don’t hope, friend...decide!"
The following article is a good reminder of our heavenly Father's love and mercy. Let us remember the
"Prodigal Son's" father when we are the one who can forgive and be merciful to a repentant husband, son
or daughter, friend and brother or sister in Christ. Let us rejoice!
The Parable of the Prodigal Son
by: Jim Bullington
So is it The
Parable of the Prodigal, or The Parable of the Jubilant Father? The answer is
both, but the emphasis is clearly on the attitude displayed by the father upon the return
of the lost boy. Contrasted with the attitude of the father is the attitude
of the older son. First, consider the attitude of the father.
Who had been wronged by the departure and unwise choices of the younger brother?
Was it not the father whose word and wise counsel was disregarded by the younger
son? Was it not the father's hard earned fortune that was squandered for
momentary pleasures by the younger son? Not that the older son was without
concern for his younger sibling, but who was apparently looking and longing for the
return of the wayward boy? One does not have to stretch his imagination very far to see
the father lamenting over the situation, yearning for the day when the younger
son would come to himself and both of their nightmares would come to an end!
Then, one day on a day that was just like every day, the fondest hopes of the
father were realized; his son came home! Live a part of that day.
"But when he [the prodigal] was still a great way off, his father saw him and had
compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him. And the son said
to him, `Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight, and am no longer
worthy to be called your son.' But the father said to his servants, `Bring
out the best robe and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand and sandals on his
feet. And bring the fatted calf here and kill it, and let us eat and be merry; for this
my son was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' And they began
to be merry." (Luke 15:20-24).
First, notice that his father saw him when he was a long way off.
This indicates that the father was looking for his return. Then, note that the father had
compassion on him; literally, he was moved with compassion originating from
the innermost part of his being. Next, the father ran! The reluctance
in the boy's heart to return home must have dissolved instantly in the sea of his
father's love! Now, watch with joy as his father falls on his neck and kisses his long
lost son! The verb tenses in this passage literally say that he kissed
him and kept on kissing him again and again. Far more than the proverbial
yellow ribbon, the jubilant father emotionally demonstrated his joy over the return of his son!
To further his joy, the father then asked his servants to join in the
festivities. And how fitting. They had known the boy before and
surely held some affection for him. "Give him the best robe, put a ring on his
finger and shoes on his feet." The father owed the son nothing; he had given
him everything before that he could rightfully claim as his own, yet the father
said give more; give the very best! And they began to be merry! What
a delightful picture of a father overwhelmed with the emotions of a son that
was dead, but now is alive! This pictures our Father when we return penitently to
Him. Just think about it and then say, Thanks!"